Cupid: God, Ham or Lunatic?
by Atomdancerrr
Summary: Set after First Loves, Cupid makes a youtube video to help find lovers to unite, encourage people to help him stay free and to bring business to Taggerty's


This is set in the old show but could apply to the new show except for different names for things and people. Every episode of the old show can be watched on youtube by the way and the three episodes of the new show can be watched at ABC's web site. Both shows are great. The new show is more light hearted but after the last few years tragedies we NEED that now, especially New York. This is set after, "First Loves." Please let me know kindly of any misspellings, really bad grammar or gross inaccuracies.

Cupid: God, Ham or Lunatic?

Dr Milton Greely called the Fair View staff meeting to order and said, "First order of business our little Lamb That went astray from the flock; Trevor Hale." Dr. Milton Greely turned to Dr Allen, "Claire have you anything new to report about his condition?"

She smiled nervously, "Sort of. He's made a youtube video!"

Milton stared at her, "A youtube video? I didn't know he was computer literate."

She shook her head, "He's not, but he is very People literate. He's got dozens of Friends and hundreds of Acquaintances. A Friend of his has a video camera and knows how to edit and upload. And this you have to see."

Milton turned on his laptop and opened up the net. "Youtube dot com. What do I look for?"

"Come on down the service is divine."

Milton typed it in youtube's internal search box and they watched.

The puckish mental patient was facing the camera and grinning broadly. They could tell he was at the bar where he worked. He waved, "Hi there folks! I'm either a harmless, VERY COMPETENT, certified Lunatic with a very pretty Psychiatrist or I am Cupid the god of love. This isn't just an advertising gimmick Folks. I am willing to take a lie detector test if anyone wants to pop for it."

Milton's jaw dropped low enough to catch a fly. "He's let the whole world know he's mentally ill!"

"Or not. Keep watching."

"I was kicked out of my Family home, Olympus without any magic at all except my considerable charm, chutzpa and tenaciousness until I unite one hundred couples in true love, and the gods decide what is true love or not. Even getting married doesn't count because they know what lasts and won't last. I really, REALLY, really want to get home so Folks help me! If you are looking for true love contact me at Taggerty's bar or if you just want a pleasant evening out also come here. I work as a Barkeep there. The drinks are good. The food is good and the music is whatever YOU make it because we are a karaoke bar too." The address of Taggerty's scrolled across the bottom of the video.

He looked more serious. "Folks please! I also need a very big favor. I need to get as many People as I can to write the Lakeview Emotional Wellness and Treatment Center because they are considering locking me up again and forcibly medicating me with an experimental medication. I don't want that. I am a free spirit. I'm harmless. I'm even beneficial. I am only here to spread the LOVE around. Then the address of the mental hospital scrolled across the bottom of the screen.

The first time Claire had saw it she thought he was going to break into one of his song and dance routines, but instead he did something even more intriguing.

The camera backed up and recorded Trevor walking over to where the dartboard had been. It had been replaced by a huge cork board about the size of a refrigerator. It had the words, "Come on down to Taggerty's" painted on it in green paint.

Trevor reached into a wicker laundry basket that had been placed on the counter. He turned towards the camera, grabbed up a hand mirror and used it to aim and fire about two hundred darts over his shoulder at the corkboard.

In darts he traced the words, "Come on down to Taggerty's." Every dart hit true. He did not misfire once."

He finished and grinned like a canary fed cat at the camera, "Crazy huh? This was done in one take. My family took away my magic but they didn't take away my hard earned skills. You just watched what I simply learned to do through a little natural talent and over two thousand years of practice. You Mortals try to top that and decide for yourself if I am a god or a harmless Lunatic who deserves his freedom!"

Off camera several People, could be heard clapping someone shouted gleefully, "Probably both, Cupid!"

He turned and grinned lovingly at them and then bowed to the camera.

The room was silent for about 30 seconds. All that could be heard was Milton nervously tapping the table with his fingers. Finally he said, "Are we in trouble?"

Claire said, "I don't know, Milton. Its not like he can sue us for having locked him up. After all being able to throw darts like that doesn't PROVE he is a divinity, and there isn't a vindictive brain cell in his head."

That wasn't what I mean. I suspect folks are going to be choosing other mental hospitals to send their loved ones to now.

Dr Frechette said, "Can WE sue HIM?"

Claire snarled at him, "For what, Doctor Hyde? He didn't' say anything about us that wasn't true. You and Milton were seriously considering recommitting him even though he hasn't done one thing wrong and forcing an experimental drug on him that is being aimed at extremely violent schizophrenics. They shouldn't even be given it but Cupid never has harmed anyone or even vaguely threatened to do so and he certainly doesn't have schizophrenia. He is so careful about what he does and says because he knows not just his freedom but my license depends on what he does and doesn't do or even says and doesn't say. He walks on eggshells and he knows it. He doesn't have a family and he's already been certified mentally ill so he's vulnerable to this sort of thing. He's not dumb and except for thinking he's an ancient Greek or Roman god he is completely in touch with reality. That's how Patients with Dissociative Identity Disorder are and you know it. He knows everything about reality but who he really is."

She continued,. "He did this tape for three reasons, only one of which is even slightly delusional. One of course is the delusional reason. Now folks will come to him to be paired up. He doesn't have to hunt for them and persuade people to let him help them. That should save him a great deal of time. Two it will indeed get public support up for keeping him out of here, and three we an be pretty darn sure Taggerty's is not going to go out of business they way so many of the bars in its area have been doing. This video was uploaded yesterday and last night the place was packed even more than usual and everyone wanted to meet Cupid. People want to have a god for a Barkeep and Trevor doesn't mind being a Barkeep one bit. For a god he is kind of on the humble side. I saw a customer vomit on him one day and he was upset but he certainly didn't' get violent and act like an outraged deity. He behaved professionally and just asked for his boss to take his shift so he could go home and get cleaned up and he tried to comfort the lady who did it because he could see she had really reacted badly to her first alcoholic drink."

"One moment of competence and emotional stability doesn't mean he is consistently stable."

Claire smiled, "He is going to make sure if you ever try to use that argument during a sanity hearing he's got evidence he has plenty more moments of emotional stability than that. His friend has taken hours and hours of videotape of him in action, interacting normally with customers and friends and even trying to learn a new skill, emailing and surfing the net so we could film him under stress. He's making a multiple youtube documentary on Trevor "Cupid" Hale and the world can decide for themselves if this man should be allowed to live free and all that time he isn't even hiding he thinks he's Cupid.

Dr. Milton Greely finally laughed, "He is crazy like a Fox and he's got us over a barrow!"

Claire grinned like a canary herself. "Yes Milton! A barrow filled with fine grade malt liquor and its location is TAGGERTY'S!"


End file.
